Noooooooooooooooooooo!

When the clock strikes midnight, Halloween will end. And then BAM! Christmas carols everywhere!

Then Cinderella ran screaming into the night, and was never seen nor heard from ever, ever again. The end.

Well, Happy Halloween anyway.

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Randy Cassingham is best known as the creator of This is True, the oldest entertainment feature on the Internet: it has been running weekly by email subscription since early 1994. It is social commentary using weird news as its vehicle so it’s fun to read. Click here for a subscribe form — basic subscriptions are free.